Ever wish that you could say what you really feel about something going on in Klal? Ever wonder just why Klal acts/thinks the way it does? Here members of Klal can have the conversations they should be having but that aren't happening elsewhere, except, perhaps, in whispered conversations in dark corners. Say what you mean here, and let us hope that some conversation now will lead to changes later, some changes that are long overdue in Klal.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Reminder
Please read the posting "A 10-Day Assignment for You" below, and please help by responding.
First, no lists of any kind would be used. This is more a "male" thing then a "female" thing, although a few parents of girls also use lists. When you have a list of girls who would go out with you then how do you concentrate on the girl who you are dating at this moment? There is a mental attitude that you need to see the whole list so as not to be mistaken in your final choice. Psychologically this is a bad thing.
"One at a Time" means you date a girl as if she were the "only" girl. You spend more time in trying to figure out if there could be something between you. You don't come home from a date, casually throw out "there was no chemistry" and then say "next," because you have no list to assure you that there is a next.
"One at a Time" levels the playing field for males and females as regards shidduchim. It creates a better dating attitude. It forces people to concentrate on the actual purpose for dating rather than on the process itself. It removes the "shopper" mentality from those looking for a shidduch. And those are just the obvious benefits.
One response I got: "Is the tedium of work getting to you?" And then, "I think any time you call a guy you're automatically on a list. Whether it's two people long or 200, there's no avoiding it."
4 comments:
What do you define as taking shidduchim "One at a Time"?
Josh,
First, no lists of any kind would be used. This is more a "male" thing then a "female" thing, although a few parents of girls also use lists. When you have a list of girls who would go out with you then how do you concentrate on the girl who you are dating at this moment? There is a mental attitude that you need to see the whole list so as not to be mistaken in your final choice. Psychologically this is a bad thing.
"One at a Time" means you date a girl as if she were the "only" girl. You spend more time in trying to figure out if there could be something between you. You don't come home from a date, casually throw out "there was no chemistry" and then say "next," because you have no list to assure you that there is a next.
"One at a Time" levels the playing field for males and females as regards shidduchim. It creates a better dating attitude. It forces people to concentrate on the actual purpose for dating rather than on the process itself. It removes the "shopper" mentality from those looking for a shidduch. And those are just the obvious benefits.
OK, makes sense.
One response I got:
"Is the tedium of work getting to you?"
And then, "I think any time you call a guy you're automatically on a list. Whether it's two people long or 200, there's no avoiding it."
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