Thursday, January 3, 2008

Lest You Think it Only Happens to Singles

I listen to the hashkafah question horror stories and wonder what the shidduch world is coming to. But the following was a real first for me.

Venue: Brooklyn, a simcha occasion in a hall.
I was standing with an acquaintance. She was dressed all in black with a "Ralph" sheitle. Her husband was wearing the requisite black hat. I was so not dressed all in black and my hubby was standing in "only" his kipah. A woman who knows this acquaintance came over to talk to her. The acquaintance introduced us. This woman looked at the two of us rather speculatively. Friend looking yeshivish to the nth degree and then there was me. Finally she asked me: "What are you?"

Maybe all the griping about that question on the blogosphere had prepared me for just this day, but I answered: "Female."

She blinked and came back with "Yes, but what kind of female?"

My turn to blink. Unless scientists have discovered something new since I went to school there is only one kind of female. It dawned on me what she was asking and I could only stare. I grudgingly said "Frum."

She sighed. "Yes, but what kind of frum?"

I salute all of you singles who have had to put up with this question numerous times and still remain sane.

I thought for a moment and then answered: "G-d's kind."

She opened her mouth and for just one terrible second I could imagine her saying "Yes, but what kind of G-d?" Thankfully she didn't. She just looked puzzled.

Later my acquaintance would tell me that the woman privately asked her if I am BT or MO or something that people don't like to mention in public. We shared a truly hearty laugh at that one--better than yelling.

Oh, by the way, that acquaintance? Hubby only wears a hat when he has to go into Brooklyn for these types of affairs, and the wife is never seen in black in the neighborhood, nor that Ralphie sheitle either. She thinks I'm something of a "chnyok" by comparison to herself. Ah, the irony.

People only see what they want to see.


Anonymous said...

"chnyok" ?

ProfK said...

Chnyok--someone who has gone way to the right religiously. Not a particularly positive connotation--usually obnoxiously religious. Also used as a comparative such as in "She has fallen off the derech (the right road), I am perfectly normal and you are a chnyok."

G said...

I salute all of you singles who have had to put up with this question numerous times and still remain sane.


Yes, well...sarcasm does have its benefits.

halfshared said...

HUH? I've never in my life met such a tactless woman. Hope your acquaintance puts her in her place before she really messes up.