Friday, July 3, 2009

Bringing it Down to a Really Human Level

So much has been written and spoken about the present economic crisis. Foremost in the minds of many Jews has been the high cost of being frum, as frum is constituted now. Everything mentioned costs in the thousands and the hundred thousands--yeshiva tuition, homes in frum neighborhoods, simcha making etc.. I am not unsympathetic to those who look at frum expenses and look at salaries of $50K, $100K, $200K and upward and ask the frustrated question "How? How will any of this get paid for?!!"

But today I got a different economic lesson that put a lot of things into perspective vis a vis what constitutes a money crunch and "not making it." I went to my regular gas station to fill up my car. Yes, I said "fill it up please" when I drove in. I noticed with some displeasure the high prices that are again in affect for gas--$2.85-9/10 at this station--and I was grouchy about the cost, but I said "fill it up." Another car pulled up to the gas island directly across from me. The woman at the wheel told the attendant that she would like $2.00 worth of gas. Both he and I stared at her. $2.00? The attendant started to say that they wouldn't sell less than one gallon of gas, but the woman forestalled him, and in a tearful voice begged him to please sell her that $2 dollar's worth of gas. She told him that all she had in her wallet was $2 and the car was on empty and she needed to put in the gas so she could go to work and pick up her paycheck. She promised him she would come back for more gas when she had money to pay for it, but without that 2/3 of a gallon she was going to be not only out of gas but out of money for everything she needed, like paying her rent and buying food. The attendant carefully squeezed out the $2 worth of gas, with the woman silently crying behind the wheel of the car.

The next time any of us is tempted to complain about our $45K tuition and our $18K camp bills, perhaps we should remember that woman and give thanks that our worries are far better funded then we will admit they are. Our problem is that we are having trouble having the tuition and the camps and the large houses and the fancy anything you want to name all at the same time.

What, I wonder, would we do if the "tank" were truly on empty and all that we had was $2?

7 comments:

Scraps said...

Wow. That's really, really sad. :(

Anonymous said...

Isn't there a saying "Live in the world we have" or something like that? Well, another saying could be "Worry about the things you need to worry about." Each person as their own worries relative to their own standing in life.

Mark

Anonymous said...

Thank you for the wake up call! Talk about counting your blessings!

Kalman said...

If I didn't have 4 kids in yeshiva I'd be $60 thousand a year richer and the world would put me in the top 5% of earners group. Oh wait. I am in that group. And the decision to spend that 60 thousand is one I can make. I'm not buying a yacht or having live in help and I don't have a jeweler on speed dial. What I have is a choice. And yes I have complained with the best of them about how things are just not affordable, and somehow I afford them anyway even if money gets tight.

And then you give the story about the woman and the gas and that puts my spending in perspective. I have a choice and I make it and I complain about it. She has no choice. Maybe it's time for some of us to count our blessings instead of cursing them.

Anonymous said...

If I saw that happening I'd buy her 10 gallons more, just in case.

Desperate Faith said...

I am hesitant to post this, as I don't want to be seen as complaining, but just to let you and all your readers know how real this is...

This was my mother this morning. She looked very down, so I asked her what was going on. She said that she doesn't know what to do. There is no food in the house with which to cook supper, so she needs to go shopping, her car is on empty, plus the battery is almost dead and needs to be changed. One of my siblings needs a medicine but the pharmacy won't let her get anything till she pays up the bill.
All this, and 30 dollars in her bank account....

It's real people. This is what we are dealing with.

ProfK said...

Anonymous,
I actually was going to pay for more gas for her and tried to get the attention of the attendant, who unfortunately speaks very limited English and didn't respond to my "pssst, please come here." It bothered me no end that she might run out of gas again somewhere.


Desperate Faith,
I cannot even begin to imagine what it must have taken for you to share your story, but I thank you for doing so. All of us could use reminding that "in financial trouble" is not always what we are really talking about when we argue 300 instead of 500 at a chasoneh etc. I hope and pray that your family will find the emotional strength and fortitude to get through this and that HaShem Yisborach will soon shower you with an abundance of his gifts.