Thursday, June 11, 2009

Dating is Strange Enough and Then IT Happens

A comment on my posting on the cost of dating was about how the commenter's first date with her now husband went awry but turned out to be a fun time anyway. That lead my mind in this direction: did anyone who is now married have all "perfect" dates with the person they married? And married or single, did you ever find yourself going out with someone again despite the strangeness of a date you had with that person?

Back in my active shidduch redting days the people I fixed up reported back with stories about some truly weird/strange/"imperfect" dates, but for many the strangeness wasn't a deterrent to going out again. On the other hand....some strange dates were a real turnoff to one or both of the datees. At this point in time I honestly can't remember any more where my husband and I went and what we did on every date we had. All that really stands out are a couple of the special/good dates. I do, however, remember a couple of reallllly strange dates with other people. I'd say in my case that it was about 50/50 as to whether I went out with them again.

Thanks to my best friend for reminding me about what is probably one of my weirdest dating experiences. Boy arrived at my house and literally dragged me at 100 miles per hour to his car. Why? In the back seat was a cage, a cage containing guinea pigs, very pregnant guinea pigs. Apparently he was taking an advanced science course and these guinea pigs were to form the basis of his final paper. Unfortunately, they had been pregnant before and the results weren't positive. This time his professor suggested he take them home and watch them carefully in case assistance was needed at some point. He was afraid to leave them alone at home so they came on the date with us. Do you have any idea how many places you can't go if you have guinea pigs with you? We ended up parked in a parking lot out at Green Acres. I ran in and got us something to drink. And yes, sure enough those guinea pigs decided to give birth during the date. Any one else who can say that they were a midwife to a guinea pig while on a first date? [Note: no, I didn't go out with him a second time. It wasn't the guinea pigs per se that caused me to say no, but when it was obvious that one of the guinea pigs was about to deliver he rather excitedly yelled at me to "Do something! You're a woman and know about this stuff!" I kind of figured that any science major who couldn't tell that there were discernible differences between guinea pigs and me just wasn't my cup of tea.]

So tell me, any strange/weird dates in your background? Did they lead anyway to another date or to marriage? Come on, share!


dating said...

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BrooklynWolf said...

My first date with Eees wasn't a "shidduch date" but a plain, old-fashioned one.

I had borrowed a car from a friend of mine and planned to take her out for a night of miniature golfing. The car my friend lent me his car on condition that we not leave Brooklyn. The car was as big as a boat and not all the parts functioned properly. But hey, it was transportation.

Well, the big night came around and it was *pouring*. Certainly not a night for miniature golf. Sadly, however, I hadn't thought far enough ahead for an alternative. So, I picked Eeees up and we decided to try bowling. We went to several lanes, only to find that they none of them had any lanes available -- it was all league bowling.

We then thought, perhaps, to try a roller skating rink that I recalled being in Brooklyn. Sadly, when we got there, we found that they had closed down years earlier.

By then it was getting late and she did have a curfew. We ended up simply going out for pizza. When we walked into the pizza shop, many of Eeees's classmates were there (it was well known in her school that we were a couple) and we got a standing ovation, causing Eeees to turn a few shades of red.

We decided to eventually have a second first-date since the first one didn't turn out as planned. Nonetheless, we both had a nice time just driving around and eating pizza, and we both laugh about it today.

The Wolf

Orthonomics said...

I can't stop laughing.

Trudy said...

Every date my hubby and I had qualified for that weird date category. On our first date the car got a flat tire and he discovered that the spare was flat too. Date was spent sitting on grass waiting for AAA to come with a spare. I figured that it wasn't really his fault and said I'd go out again.

Second date he brought cans of soda with him to take to the zoo with us. Ever see what happens to a can of soda that gets shaken up? He opened the can and gave both of us a soda shower.

At first I just kept going out because I figured it had to get better at some point. After a while he grew on me, disasters and all. After he asked me to marry him and I said yes, the really weird part was that nothing strange ever again happened to us when we were out together.

Anonymous said...

The first date I had with my future)husband, he drove up to NYC to go out with me. He spent more time looking for parking then he did driving from his home (2 hours away). When we walked out to his beautiful car, he proudly told me, "I just made the last payment on my car & now it is all mine." Of course, it would not start. He then proceded to try to flag down a taxi to give his battery a jump. When that failed, I called a friend in the city with a car, & he had jumper cables.
I think it was also the same date when I dropped Duck Sauce down the front of my white dress.
He married me anyway.

SubWife said...

My friend called me once on a Sunday suggesting a shidduch. I was a bit fed up with dating and decided that from now on I will go out on my terms. So I told her, the guy could call me as long as he was not a smoker (she didn't know if he was), he shouldn't call me on a Wednesday night (I had a shiur) and he should not ask "tell me something about yourself."

The rest is easy to guess. As I was getting settled at the shiur Wednesday night, I got a call on my cell phone. I left the room, rolled my eyes and answered the phone. The guy on the other line, obviously smoking, introduced himself, and within 30 seconds asked me the dreaded, "So tell me a bit about yourself." I remembered thinking, "I haven't even met him, and he is already annoying me."

We are married now.

Bas~Melech said...

Hm, I think a guinea-pig-birthing date sounds a lot more exciting than any I've had lately! Are there any zoology majors left for me?

This didn't happen to me, but a relative of mine who is generally extremely suave (like, never does embarrassing things. Ever.) tripped on his way into a first date and fell onto his future father-in-law. It wouldn't have been THAT funny except that he's so not the klutzy type.

Ezzie said...

Sounds like the lessons so far are that horrible dates = quick rejections OR marriage.

Ser and I had a few bad stories. First time we went up to Monsey for a date (first time I met her parents), we borrowed their car and went to the Palisades Mall. After we got out, we came out and the car was gone. We walked and walked halfway around the place - still nothing. (The mall was closed and everybody was gone.) Finally a mall cop took me in his little buggy, leaving Serach alone by an entrance, and we went all the way around and found it - it was not 15 feet from where we came out, but there's a big divider wall you can't go or see around.

My friend had to pick me up from her house at 1am that time.

Note that earlier in the evening, while her father told a story about a gypsy woman whose kids all were taken to the hospital for internal bleeding because she'd made the food "crunchy" by mashing up a light bulb in it, my future mother-in-law dropped a glass which shattered into the rice she was preparing. I'd also been introduced to my future SIL's car, which was approximately a 6x3 crunched piece of metal, which she'd spun on a highway off a guardrail smashing the whole back in (stopping later to pick up the bumper she heard fall off and place it in the backseat), then driven home anyway. (She was fine.) All in all, a wonderful introduction to one another.

Another time we borrowed their car, turned into Starbucks... but it was closed already. (It was nighttime and raining.) As we're about to turn around, the car dies in the empty lot. We had to have her parents come and pick us up.

dating said...

Dating is really wonderful it is more enjoyable than any other thing in this world.

Tamar said...

My strangest date didn't involve anything weird. It was just the opposite--it was too perfect. I had once a long time before confided in a friend what I thought the absolutely most perfect date would be. I let my imagination go all out. Things like he would arrive with a perfect pink rose, he would make sure the restaurant had plump raspberries for dessert, there would be the Moonlight Sonata playing on the tape deck, and a whole lot more. I said all this and then forgot about it.

This same friend set me up on a date with someone years later, remembered what I had said, and gave the boy over this information. You can't imagine how freaky it was to have this actually happen. Particularly freaky because it was the perfect date but the wrong boy.

Michal said...

This is my favorite story about when my parents (!) were dating:

My dad was totally in love with my mom, but she would not go out with him. So he went out with her roommate instead, and after hearing her friend praise him, my mom suddenly realized that maybe he was a better catch than she thought. Fortunately, things didn't work out with the roommate.

On my dad's first date with my mom, he was so excited and nervous that he threw up in the middle of the date. Luckily (for me), my mom decided it was cute and a sign of his feelings, and didn't end things there.

Anonymous said...

So let me get this straight: you didn't decide not go out with this guy again because he was too immature, weird, and irresponsible to think that bringing pregnant genuine pigs on a date was inappropriate, but because he insulted your feminist sensibilities?

God feminists are annoying.

ProfK said...

No, Anonymous, I didn't not go out with him again because he insulted my "feminist sensibilities." Having brought the guinea pigs on the date he then assumed that I, solely by virtue of my gender, would take care of his mess for him. Based on a shared chromosome he assumed that I would be willing/able to deliver those guinea pigs. Had far more to do with my insight that if I continued to date this guy I'd be cleaning up a lot of other messes for him.

Wouldn't repeat that feminists are annoying mark around my mom. My five foot nothing, 86 year old mom is still quite capable of taking on and reducing to ashes anyone who makes that kind of comment in front of her.

A Living Nadneyda said...

The guinea pig thing never would have bothered me -- the opposite. I would have found it very appealing.

That Guy I Married is not an Animal Person. But I love him anyway, because he puts up with me being one. (Who else would let me keep rats in the living room?)

A Living Nadneyda said...

Appealing, of course, except for the "you're a woman" part. That's just a complete non-sequitur, which would make me wonder what other skill-sets he's randomly assigned to women.

I like your mom already...