Be It Ever So Humble, There's No Place Like Home

I have done my share of NY bashing--I admit that freely. There is much about the place that I don't like, that doesn't make me happy, that makes my blood boil. But.......I'll freely and gladly say that, given most of the rest of the city, I have been blessed to be living in Staten Island.


No, the Island is not problem free. The City of NY has long treated it as both the unloved sibling and a handy cash cow. We don't have the less expensive public transportation that the rest of the city has. What's worse, the MTA uses all the monies collected from our various bridges to support mass transit in other parts of the region rather than using the monies to build up our local system.

But as a frum Jew, I give thanks every morning that I am living on the Island. No, we are not malachim here. There are individuals who have had and have fights with other individuals--we're human beings with human foibles. But as a community we are so much a live and let live type of place. The shuls--every last one of them--work in cooperation on community issues. It matters not a whit what your hashkafa is or what label you wear--we simply don't divide ourselves into little warring enclaves. We run the gamut here from the left to the middle to the right. And no one is turning up their nose at anybody else's practices. If privately someone feels that another type of practice isn't the way to go, still, you won't hear this publicly.

This is a place where you know your neighbors, all of your neighbors. This is a place where kids on the same block go out in the street and play with each other, regardless of what school or shul they go to. This is a place where everyone, but everyone, says good Shabbos or good Yom Tov when you are walking on the street, regardless of lavush or of sex. This is a place where achdus is not just a word in the dictionary but an everyday occurrence. This is a place where when trouble strikes one of our residents we all pitch in.

And here's something else that makes me thankful to be living here. This is not a place where money is the deciding factor on your "status" in the community. Sure, there are a few people who are first out of the gate to wear the latest fashions or to buy the latest doodads. So? They don't set the tone for the community. There is very little of keeping up with the Schwartzes going on here, certainly not as a community mindset. Just for the record, there are some seriously monied people living here, the kind of money that would get these people anything they wanted relating to "kovod" in other communities. [Note: and yes,they do get kavod from us when they give tzedaka with an open hand and are active in our community organizations.] And yes, a whole slew of upper middle class incomes being made by those in the highest paying professions. And also yes, lots of people in the middle class, and a fair amount of those who haven't got a lot of money. And for the most part everyone is living in the same types of houses as everybody else does, and living the same type of life. Do those with more money than some other people in the neighborhood spend more? Spend more on what are considered luxuries? Quite probably, but who cares? People here don't pick friends based on the contents of their wallets.

I believe it was mentioned on another blog that we have Joseph Avenue, and this equates to "Winthrop Avenue" in Teaneck or back bay Lawrence. Let's put that myth to rest. Joseph Avenue has one block, and a short block at that, of over sized houses on it. Are we talking gazillionaires row here? Nope. Some of those living there are just plain comfortable--they were lucky to get the lots and build when housing did not cost what it costs now, and the lots are not mega-sized. The rest of Joseph Avenue has attached row houses and attached two-family houses on it. There's no "rich enclave" isolated in our community.

The insides of the Island houses? Whatever you want. Frankly, no one judges you on how you have decorated or on what brand names are attached to your furnishings. Someone buys or leases a luxury car? So? Someone buys a dining room set? We hope they use it for lots of simchas. Someone is taking a "fancy" vacation? We hope they enjoy it. If there is kinah in SI you'd need a super power magnifying glass and Sherlock Holmes to find it.

And have I mentioned that yeshiva tuitions here are fairly reasonable when viewed against tuitions in the rest of the city? And that the schools in our area know they are dependent on the good will of the community so they work together with the parents? And that the community supports the schools, even those members who don't have children in them?


There isn't a required simcha style here--you do what you want and what you can afford and nobody looks funny at you for doing so. Sure, there have been some megabucks simchas made by people in the community--exceptions rather than the rule that everyone "must" follow. And those making those simchas had the money to pay for them without going into serious debt. They weren't made by families giving in to community pressure to conform, since there isn't any such pressure.

You would think that a community the size of ours would have at least 1/2 dozen restaurants in residence. Wrong. Over the years some restaurants have opened and have pretty much faded away soon after. The pizza shop/dairy restaurant stays in business. There's still a small cafe type of place around after a few years. Last year a kosher Duncan Donuts opened. That's it. We aren't an every day into a restaurant type of place. If you don't feel like cooking or get stuck there are always the two butchers/take home food places for some take home food. This is a place where people, for the most part, eat at home, with their families. Women--yes, and some men as well--cook here.

To sum up, Staten Island isn't a place overloaded with the trappings of a forced, conspicuous consumerist attitude. You don't have to be anything but yourself here, and you choose that for yourself. It's a frum neighborhood where I live (there's more than one neighborhood but Willowbrook is generally what people refer to when they talk about SI) and you are free to define frum any way you want to.

So yes, there's one really great thing about NY, and I'm living there.