I've been told for forever that age brings discretion with it. I'm not sure I believed it until just now. I am definitely practicing discretion right now. I am not pouring out the post I would so like to. I'm going to calm down first. But even before that I'm going to spend about an hour rinsing with an antiseptic mouthwash to get the bad taste out of my mouth of one of the postings that appeared in the latest Havail Havalim, the one about "Hot Chanis." Just typing that label has now sullied my fingers and I'll have to spend some time with an antiseptic soap as well.
Sinas chinam, kinah, lust and degradation all go hand in hand with talking about "Hot Chanis" and I refuse to dirty my keyboard or myself with having anything to do with a label that casts vile aspersions on the person so labeled and that shows the labeler to be no better than what he/she is pointing out in that person so labeled.
Sorry, it may take two gallons of the mouthwash, that's how bad the taste of one part of Klal attacking another part is to me.
9 comments:
Wow, get a sense of humor. It's a JOKE.
BTW, are you hot chani?
JOKE. ;-)
Sorry Anonymous but I'm of the wrong generation and the wrong sex to see any humor in "Hot Chani-ism." What I saw today were a lot of vulgar comments, a lot of comments inappropriate for someone who purports to be frum to be making, and discussion that once, thankfully, was confined to the boys' locker room. Oh that the conversation had remained in the sweaty confines of that locker room.
I didn't see any of that, I was just kidding around about the whole stereotype in general.
And here I thought that we got a good start in the 60s on eliminating language that made women into sex objects. Leave it to us to go retro.
Up until last month I would have thought you were way overreacting to a posting that someone thought was being cute. I overheard someone call a young lady who had come into the room a Hot Chanie. I looked up to see who he was referring to and it was my daughter! The shoe does not feel good when it is on your own foot.
I was also disgusted by that post, and yes, I do have a sense of humor, but that doesn't make everything laughable.
Thank you for this post. I am still not able to respond to this stuff coherently, but here you have the worst of our attitudes to women, in a nutshell. And note how they talk about women who they do not think are "hot:" they are frumps, have let themselves go, and deserve it if their husbands look elsewhere. Sorry, but this really has been making me very bitter. And calling it a joke is a time-honored way of coercing the victim into going along with the whole thing; just as people "jokingly" talk about black people or Jews.
Readers might want to look at this past posting of mine
http://conversationsinklal.blogspot.com/2008/06/speaking-of-watching-our-language.html
that dealt specifically and in detail with my objections to the term Hot Chanie. My views have not changed.
At first I thought you were going overboard, but I'm willing to say fair enough. I will try not to use the term. However, to paraphrase Justice Potter Stewart, you know one when you see one.
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