tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post4334632879132805425..comments2024-02-23T04:39:49.329-05:00Comments on Conversations in Klal: Where to Date? The World is Your OysterProfKhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17954446826821665314noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-19705000970988459932011-03-09T08:14:46.697-05:002011-03-09T08:14:46.697-05:00Chaim: Everything that I suggested is available on...Chaim: <b>Everything</b> that I suggested is available on weekday evenings. <a href="http://store-locator.barnesandnoble.com/storelocator/stores.aspx?pagetype=eventList&city=New+York&state=NY&zip=" rel="nofollow">here's </a> Barnes & Nobles events list for New York City. City Harvest needs volunteers to pick up unused food from catered events at all hours. Neighborhoods that I've wandered through after dark include Borough Park, Greenpoint, Astoria, 90% of Manhattan, and the Staten Island Ferry. Want to stay underground? Go on a Subway tour, and check out some of the artwork throughout the system. Ride the 6 train "loop" a few times to get a good glimpse of the magnificent (and never used) City Hall station. <br /><br />Not all of these might be of interest to you, and that's fine. The point is: make yourself a more interesting person, and be willing to share new experiences with your date. It's much more informative than sitting around trying to think up conversation points.efrexnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-64290106822497673042011-03-08T22:44:49.217-05:002011-03-08T22:44:49.217-05:00Chaim,
Virtually all of the arcades and sports ve...Chaim,<br /><br />Virtually all of the arcades and sports venues have evening hours or at least one night during the week that they are open at night. Most of the museums have at least one night during the week that they are open late. The various lectures around the city on interesting topics usually happen during evening hours. Kol isha a problem? Don't pick a musical but a regular theatre showing. The various YMHAs and Jewish Community Centers around the city have evening programs. Colleges for sure have wide variety of evening programs during the week.<br /><br />No, not every single thing you may want to do is available during weekday nights, but a whole lot are. Takes a bit of planning and some checking to see what is doing and when. Sure, a lounge date at the Marriott is easy but it's not all that hard to find something else to do.ProfKhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17954446826821665314noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-60586947109393311542011-03-08T22:16:30.754-05:002011-03-08T22:16:30.754-05:00Efrex, my point was that almost all the "grea...Efrex, my point was that almost all the "great ideas" that everyone can think of can not be done on a winter night, maybe some slack should be cut for the lounge guys. your suggestions - how about kol isha? also can you tell me how late at night they are open? any suggestions on neighborhoods that are great to visit on a winter night?<br /><br />All I'm saying is cut these guys some slack and how about some viable date venues?<br /><br />I struggled finding activities for winter nights- day dates were always museums and the like.chaimnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-30383050136085590012011-03-08T09:01:47.989-05:002011-03-08T09:01:47.989-05:00Chaim:
You want a date on a winter night? Check o...Chaim:<br /><br />You want a date on a winter night? Check out an off-Broadway show. Go to an author's reading at a local bookstore. Volunteer with City Harvest. Go to a lecture at Cooper Union or the New York Public Library. Ride the Subway to a neighborhood that you've never been to before and walk around. <br /><br />FIND AN ACTIVITY THAT INTERESTS YOU AND SHARE IT WITH SOMEBODY ELSE!efrexnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-36367361070561304432011-03-07T21:35:24.725-05:002011-03-07T21:35:24.725-05:00Oh yeah. Senior year, you were required to take a ...Oh yeah. Senior year, you were required to take a course called "Family Living." In addition to dating stuff, we got told how we'd run households (including yielding authority to our husbands...don't even get me started on that one). I had to actually give up my lunch period one day a week for that one.<br /><br />But the lecture in question took place as part of our "Machsheves Yisrael" course, which some of us unofficially called "religious group think indoctrination 101." There was some actual Judaic Philosophy in there (and we learned some Mishne Torah), but it was interspersed with stuff I was almost ordered by my parents to forget.<br /><br />My parents were big on us thinking for ourselves. Not something Yeshivas really encourage nowadays.ProfK_Offspringnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-76265179186704766252011-03-07T21:09:43.019-05:002011-03-07T21:09:43.019-05:00"ProfK_offspring"
"At a lecture ab..."ProfK_offspring"<br /><br />"At a lecture about dating at my yeshiva HS . . ."<br /><br />i know i shouldn't be surprised, but did you really have lectures about dating in HS?Abba's Rantingshttp://abbasrantings.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-89946480770753841092011-03-07T20:18:56.976-05:002011-03-07T20:18:56.976-05:00Almost all of your suggestions aren't really p...Almost all of your suggestions aren't really practical for a date on a winter night.chaimnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-66226528126206658992011-03-07T18:44:56.901-05:002011-03-07T18:44:56.901-05:00There used to be a very popular "date place&q...There used to be a very popular "date place" in Long Island called the Timepiece Cafe that had all sorts of games available for people to play. I think it closed sometime in the 90's.Marknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-73410627144488997862011-03-07T18:41:12.219-05:002011-03-07T18:41:12.219-05:00Anon 8:24 am - First rule in chess--play to win. ...Anon 8:24 am - <i>First rule in chess--play to win. First rule in shidduchim--don't play, you can't win.</i><br /><br />What if you played chess on 10 shidduchim and 1 out of 10 was impressed at your chess-playing ability and decided to continue the relationship due in part to that fact?Marknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-35228644485279727172011-03-07T18:39:30.815-05:002011-03-07T18:39:30.815-05:00ProfK, add this recent blogpost to your list :-)
...ProfK, add this recent blogpost to your list :-)<br /><br />http://leftovercholent.blogspot.com/2011/03/not-your-average-shidduch-date.htmlMarknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-46699421067186589312011-03-07T12:26:21.344-05:002011-03-07T12:26:21.344-05:00Some guys would absolutely find losing to a woman ...Some guys would absolutely find losing to a woman a blemish on their manhood.<br /><br />Competitive, accomplished women should not marry men like that.<br /><br />I'm more competitive than my wife, but she occasionally beats me at things. I like that better than if she threw the matches. I once dated a girl fiercely competitive that would often beat me, that was cool too. The end of the relationship had nothing to do with that fact.<br /><br />There is a weird culture of complaining. There is plenty of free/inexpensive stuff to do here. There is plenty of free/inexpensive stuff to do in New York.<br /><br />I remember going to a bunch of cool coffee shops in the Village.<br /><br />What's wrong with a day time date?Miami Alhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02977503720972852329noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-6765223869063473792011-03-07T11:55:20.202-05:002011-03-07T11:55:20.202-05:00JS-thats horrible..people need to stop living for ...JS-thats horrible..people need to stop living for other people and do it their way (within confines of halacha of course)aminspirationhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02226594722883362146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-10093928573904466692011-03-07T11:44:59.922-05:002011-03-07T11:44:59.922-05:00This made me laugh. It seems it's either the ...This made me laugh. It seems it's either the Marriott lounge or the Toys R Us in midtown. I don't think it's so much lack of creativity as it is this insane need to conform - that only certain date locations and activities are "acceptable." In our communities often creativity is punished and you're branded weird or, worse, not frum.<br /><br />A friend went on a date with a guy who so wanted to conform that he took her up to the Marriott lounge. Only problem? He was deathly afraid of heights. They got in the elevator and he started having a panic attack just as it started going up (made worse by the fact the elevators are glass). It was so bad, he wouldn't take the elevator back down. They had to walk down all those flights of stairs. If it wasn't so sad, it would be hilarious.JSnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-40478020321164046122011-03-07T10:45:58.487-05:002011-03-07T10:45:58.487-05:00I remember that game playing lounge really well Pr...I remember that game playing lounge really well Prof. Spent many a date down in the Village playing. The atmosphere was relaxing and you and your date just got to be yourselves.<br /><br />If someone is looking for a sure fire business to go into, they might consider opening a lounge like that somewhere convenient for today's daters. Provide enough types of games and a couple could spend their whole dating life--all 6-7 dates of it--going nowhere but to that lounge.Mendynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-62521196424283512962011-03-07T10:34:29.784-05:002011-03-07T10:34:29.784-05:00I'm all for playing to win on dates. Competiti...I'm all for playing to win on dates. Competition is fun. You need someone who can give some back..otherwise you might as well be talking to a wall. This applies both to verbally and physically. There is nothing that compares to a real good verbal battle..who can come up with the best comeback..the challenge is exhilarating..no?aminspirationhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02226594722883362146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-47844915109713727332011-03-07T10:13:57.698-05:002011-03-07T10:13:57.698-05:00One of my nieces made sure to tell every shadchan ...One of my nieces made sure to tell every shadchan that one of her requirements was that she NOT be taken to the Marriot lounge. If a boy couldn't figure out someplace else to go with the riches of NYC around she figured he was not overly bright, too quick to follow the crowd and basically lazy. Limited her dates somewhat but one boy was curious enough to find out why she wouldn't go to the Marriot that he found another interesting place to take her. The rest is history as they just celebrated their 2nd anniversary.Ritanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-21289872802505476282011-03-07T10:12:40.840-05:002011-03-07T10:12:40.840-05:00Hah! At a lecture about dating at my yeshiva HS (t...Hah! At a lecture about dating at my yeshiva HS (this goes back 20 years), it was implied that we should lose to guys at Trivial Pursuit if we played because guys couldn't handle losing to women. My mother will remember my reaction: As if! <br /><br />We are serious game players in my house and throwing something to assuage some guy's ego is not on the list of acceptable options. A favorite family story: My father blew my mother out of the water when they played Scrabble while they were still in Sheva Brachos. Ima wasn't necessarily thrilled about it (and teased him about shalom bayis), but she would have been even more ticked off if she'd found out he'd thrown the game.<br /><br />Will say this: I mentioned that I liked Boggle a lot to a guy I was dating and on the next date he brought a set so we could play. He scored major listening points even if I did obliterate him. And we went out again.ProfK_offspringnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-30333961270611327492011-03-07T09:03:46.328-05:002011-03-07T09:03:46.328-05:00Sounds like playing games on a date is a great ide...Sounds like playing games on a date is a great idea, Anonymous #1. Do you really want to end up with someone who can't take losing to his wife? I have to agree with Anonymous #2 (How about a little creativity with names? :-P) that any guy worth his salt would be confident enough not to let it bother him. And the fact that you play chess is awesome. I've only been on a date with one girl who played chess well, and I thought it was remarkably impressive and attractive, so don't hide your skills, go out and destroy your next opponent...I mean date.<br /><br /><a href="http://asformeandbeiti.blogspot.com" rel="nofollow">Primum Non Nocere: The DOG Score</a>Primum Non Nocerehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01928564781704168333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-70010096541165418592011-03-07T08:57:58.184-05:002011-03-07T08:57:58.184-05:00My wife and I had a number of board game dates (St...My wife and I had a number of board game dates (Starbucks, the sociology section in B&N). The competition was keen - I cleaned up in Trivial Pursuit, she cleaned my clock in Monopoly.<br /><br />It helps to be secure in your own identity before you start dating.KandaBernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-22257109108867209042011-03-07T08:50:53.443-05:002011-03-07T08:50:53.443-05:00So sad that he would feel that way. I think a man ...So sad that he would feel that way. I think a man comfortable in his own skin would enjoy a challenge, and respect and like a woman who can provide it. A spouse should be smart and resourceful.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2096776708897685863.post-29780805021786511962011-03-07T08:24:07.994-05:002011-03-07T08:24:07.994-05:00About that playing games, not so sure it's a g...About that playing games, not so sure it's a good idea for some. Had a teacher in high school that discouraged the game playing. She put it that guys don't like losing and specially to girls. So that means playing badly so you don't win. I don't consider that honest so I avoid the games. <br /><br />Once I got stuck and I ended up winning. I think the guy wanted to show off how good he was at chess. It didn't work that way. My father is a rated chess master and having no sons he taught us girls to play. Sure enough the idiot told the shadchan that he thought I had too aggressive a personality for him.<br /><br />First rule in chess--play to win. First rule in shidduchim--don't play, you can't win.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com